Eleven years gone as of this year.

Greetings People

I guess I have a lot to say, but not enough time on my lunch hour. Nor have I come up with a clear thought to blog about.

So, today for some unknown reason I got up at 4:15 AM and was wide awake. Not sure why. I knew I was up, going to be up, from the moment I awoke. I got up cleaned up the kitchen, put away the clean dishes from the Dishwasher and the dishes that I had to hand wash. Took out some trash, tidied up the Dining and Living Room.

After all that, I turned on the TV and was started to flip through the channels. I then happened to see Hank Azaria and I knew immediately what show had just started at 5:00 AM. "Tuesday's with Morrie" Well, that was pretty much it for me. I settled down on the couch and started to watch this movie I love. Why? Well, it is basically how the title sounds. Long story short Morrie is dying with ALS and the character by Hank reunites with Morrie. And well readers that is all I am going to say.

A very touching movie for me since this is the sort of situation I was in 11 years ago. She was a girlfriend, but not a "girlfriend". You readers may think you have a best friend, but I will guarantee you that you do not know a best friend when the your friend is dying and you are there experiencing with him/her. I would not classify "a disease and beating it" as something that might draw the both of you together closer. I my humble opinion of course. Yes, my dad had/has cancer and did the surgery/treatment and now are waiting the term limit after treatment. Did I become closer? no.

In the other case of mine - I spent four months with my friend until the end. I am not going to say the event humbled me nor changed my outlook on life, but the last few years I have come to acknowledged it damaged all my relationships with women after she was gone. I do not want the responsibility or become responsible for another person. Nor do I want to see someone at their "not their best day" For example - after my dad had surgery I could not go into his hospital room after the recovery. I did not want to see my dad in this way. Yes, I was very happy everything went well, but I could not make myself go into the hospital room. I reminded me of the past of mine.

Well, as you can see the morning was good, but sad since I had a lot of memories flow back in my head on this particular morning. I had a lump in my throat and a few tears. No breakdown readers so you better get that out of your head!

I have not had a best friend since then nor a stable relationship. So, sort of getting back to the story, I found out what a friend I was to her and I hope that I was there for her, and hope she did not think I was just there for her for the wrong reason one may come to. I now have friends and acquaintances, which are just fine since I have no one to worry about nor would I have to subject myself to another experience like this.

Anyway, thought to blog about my morning. Again sort of random thoughts, but I thought to use the blog so I can look back later. Who knows.

Other than that - in the forties this morning. very windy. A beautiful day overall and I think I have sort of plan to have a few drinks tonight after this morning's event. Nothing bad nor good, but I was just caught off guard.

31 days of Oscar - The movie that I saw last night for the first time was Children of a Lesser God. Wow! I had some respect for William Hurt, but I did not realize what sort of performance he did in the movie.

I saw my "Orange Eskimo" in her "orange" coat this morning. She was full of smiles since she gets out of work at 3:00 pm and has Monday off. She had to rub it in and say I could of have the same deal, but no. Mr Charley had to leave Archstone-smith. Too bad.

until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete