I called my friend that who I worked with at my previous job before taking a permanent job in the corporate world this past week.
I wanted to ask her how her Thanksgiving was and subconsciously I was needed to let her know that I was ok.
I am not sure if I have shared with you readers since starting this blog, but during this time of the year I am not “I.” Many, and I mean many things have happened during this time of the year that has caused me not to celebrate and enjoy this time of the year.
A broken heart, a serious bike crash, a death that was expected, but very hard to take, a loss, and so on has made this a time of the year different from everyone else. I am not comfortable saying Merry or Happy Christmas. However, I do say I hope that the holidays are what you want.
With age I have been able to cope and deal with this time of the year. Yet, in the past I have came very close to depression, in my opinion. My feelings are near the edge and sometimes it may only take something as a commercial to make me feel sad. Though these past few years I have learned to deal with this time of the year and deal with the others that enjoy this time of the year.
After all, during this time of the year I have no right to project how I feel about life at that moment onto my friends, strangers or anyone else.
Returning to the story, I thought about my old, old friend that I knew from the company before coming to the company I left. I knew her when she was married and the eventually separation. I got to know her and her two children. I got to know how intelligent and mature she was for her age, which was she was younger than me. She was about 5 years younger than me and someone I came to respect.
Respect. In my view, anyone younger than me I regard as inexperience. Not as I am better than him/her but just not knowledgeable. Yet, with my old friend… let me give her a name, with “Iris” I was not thinking my usual thinking.
Iris was different. She is black (afro-American) and not the typical black woman you may know from TV, movies or books. She is very nice, so not the typical black acting woman, and does not speak that “Ebonics.”
Iris is more humble than I ever shall be. And I am sure that she would continue to be so.
So, while talk to my friend I asked if Iris was still working there. She said yes. I asked for her number.
I got Iris’s number and thankfully she was still there. I was ashamed that I have not even contacted her since leaving my last job. After all I knew Iris before even coming to the job we both worked at. I hope I was there for her during her separation and I knew I was there to listen to her to talk. And believe me Readers Iris is just as private about her life as I am. With that you can see I feel bad about not calling her since leaving her life.
Readers, well not since I started blogging, but I still have not told you a lot of stuff about me. Those are still private and I will perhaps tell them in time.
Five minutes later I finished up my phone call with my old friend and then I saw myself staring, looking at the post-it note with Iris’s phone number.
I was scared and thought what or how should I start.
I picked up the phone and started dialing. I soon heard that familiar tone “You have reached a number that is no longer in service or disconnected. Please check the number you have dial and try again”
Did I dial wrong?
Sure enough. I dialed 303 when I have should have dialed 720.
I try again. Ring. Ring. “Hello this is Iris”
“Hi. This is Mr. Charley. How are you?”
“Good. How are you doing?” with Iris knowing who I was immediately.
Fast-forward about 20 minutes. I soon said goodbye to Iris. I am so glad to re-connect with Iris. After all it was my fault for not continuing my friendship with her.
I am just so glad that she did not quit/leave that job. Talking to Iris brought back memories and how we both were to each other – true friends in a sense. Not sharing secrets, but life. Enjoying lunch together which we shared our intimate things with each other.
“Iris” I know that I gave you the web address of my blog and I do not know if you will visit or not, but I am sorry for not contacting you since I left the place we worked at together.
I think perhaps it is during this time of the year that I thought of you since I do need people I know and care about to help me get through the end of the year. You do not know that just talking to you is enough to make me continue to be sane. Please catch up on my history with this blog since it was started after I left the company.
You will see that I have not changed… well perhaps a bit, but I think in a positive way. I am not asking for any comment or anything else from you, nor am I expecting anything from you. Yet, I want to apologize for being “silent” the past three years.
In closing “Iris” I wish I could name you by your real name, but I give code names to my friends that I talk about so no one can identify the people I know on this blog. “Iris” thanks for talking to me and perhaps forgiving for not contacting you for the past three years. Believe me Iris you made my week and month, and for that please forgive me for not contacting you since leaving you.
I hate to bring this up, but if I am wrong, please tell so I know not to bother you anymore. I know we talked for about 20 minutes or so and I got the impression that were okay with each other, but I am giving you the option for you to say goodbye to me. You know that saying… “Some things are left…”
Though, I am happy I did call and was able to talk to you. I am okay Iris.
With that I wish you and my Readers the best during this holiday.
Until the next time
The Fallen Athlete
Until the next time
The Fallen Athlete