I made one of the toughest things that I have not done in a long time.
I called a friend (well, Readers that may not be entirely true since I was not friend material for most of the year) yesterday after finding out she was terminated.
She gave me her phone number about a year or two years ago and I have never called her since that time.
With me just finding out what happen, my current status with me as not being a friend and something else - I had to call.
Though before making that call it was actually making the call. It was like calling a woman for the first time to go out on a date. Was the phone number still good? Was she going to answer? What am I going to say? Does she even want to hear from me? What would she say to me?
When was a good time to call? Do I call from home? From work? Perhaps I should have a drink before calling after I get home. Should I call after 5 PM? And so goes the questions
Needless to say, I picked up the phone and started dialing a few times all day then stopped. Eventually, it was time to man up and get it over. Boy, I was nervous and was sweating under my armpits. Oh yes, that's how nervous I was.
I dialed and soon heard the automated voice indicating please hold while that party is located.
That was the longest 15 seconds, I think, that I waited.
It was even longer wait than my mom's voice last week saying "That another Charley died." I was so nervous after hearing that - fearing the worst.
Anyway, soon I hear her voicemail message and was kind of relieved that I got her voicemail. Though, the thought of what would be appropriate/right to leave was next. I did think for a microsecond of hanging up, but x'ed that thought.
Readers, I did not want to ramble with my voicemail message, but I think I did. I did say I was sorry, I also said I would be probably the last person who thought she would hear from. And a couple of others things. I said bye and that was that.
I was relieved after the phone call, but was shaking a bit. Did I do the right thing?
I know Readers I am being vague and not telling you what happened for me to be the way to her this year. If you faithful Readers know me then you know I do not like being treated a certain way. It happened with me from her and I did not like that. And Readers I could not not pretend that it did not ever happen. I was looking for a sorry or something, but that did not happen. Eventually, I gave her the silent treatment.
Yet, finding out I put all that aside and made the call. Perhaps she may call me back. Perhaps she will talk to me again. Perhaps she will tell me - Fuck you. Perhaps. If not, I do not blame her and I will understand.
I am sorry for the way I left her the last time she ever saw/talked to me.
And Readers this is another reason to add to why I do not care for the Holidays this time of the year.
Note to Nick - I guess your statement long ago to me - that I am the rudest person ever - is correct. She would agree with you.
Until the next time
The Fallen Athlete