It's gonna get colder baby!

Greetings Readers

Fuck me. You know Readers? From time to time I have shown (written) that I am a "penny pincher" from time to time.

Anyway, it got colder today.

So, there I was getting off work later than I should of and knew that I was going to take Light Rail and then try to time the RTD bus on the bus route that I need to catch on the way home.

I got changed, bundled up pretty good and my fare ($2.25) ready before heading out in the sub-zero temperature outside. I was riding on the streets due to the sidewalks not being shovel out from the snow. Anyway, it was about 6:00 P.M. so traffic was light.

I came to the street that I was to turn on when I thought to myself... what if I have to wait for the next Light Train to come? I ain't going to wait in this mother fucking cold. No way. And then have to pay 2.25 just for a short Light Rail ride and then perhaps another wait until a RTD bus shows up for my bus route? No way. I am keeping my money. I would rather suffer now and keep the money than have to wait for the Light Rail, get warm, get cold waiting for the bus, and then finally get warm on a short bus ride home.

Six miles. Yet, miles in this fucking cold. Well, I kept on riding and was doing good. Though until about mile three, I estimate when I started to feel the cold in my fingers, feet, and the outside of my thighs.

And that is where this is the picture was taken about. About three miles from work and about three miles from home. I thought what the fuck. I stopped riding and decided to take a picture. Might as well mark the moment on this frigid evening. Also, it would stop the frigid wind I was feeling on my body and face from bike riding with Lily.

In the end I was very cold, but ok in a manner of speaking - as long I was not misery cold. I thought about taking a hot shower to warm up, but then thought otherwise. I turn on the t.v. switched to W.W.E. Raw, then turned on the stereo and turned off the t.v. I was going to crawl into bed and just listen to the t.v., W.W.E. Raw, in the dark.

Man oh man, certain parts of my body were very cold. It was cold in the sheets, but I could actually feel the frigid cold that my body experienced. Wow. I would say all in all it took about 30 minutes for me to actually feel warm and okay. The outside of my thighs got real cold. That is the part that usually does not get cold due to the pedaling and the blood flow being circulated in the thighs. Yet, tonight the skin on my thigh was icy cold to the touch.

Crazy.

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

As my ex-co-worker would say "Awesome"

Greetings Readers

So, I was on my way home when I had to make a stop at the local Supermarket to pick up my lunch for the week – Sunflower.

I have found out that Sunflower does have the cheapest produce, in my opinion, and usually the freshest produce around my part of the town.

I knew where I was going and also was on a mission to get in and out as soon as possible.

A few minutes later I was walking to the check out line – the one that I usually go to.

That was when I saw her. A woman from my past. Actually, it is the one to whom I refer to “as my ex-co-worker would say "Awesome." The very one Readers.

I could not believe it – I think it has been about 5 years since I last saw her.

Nothing bad, nothing good, but honestly Readers I was not in the mood to say “Hey…”

So, I headed to another open check out line, which by the way was only the next one over from her.

I made sure not to make any eye contact over in next line. I kept my eyes focused on my cashier and see how things play out. Meaning, would she initiate a conversation. If she did, so be it. If she does not, then so be it.

I smiled and made small talk with my cashier and played it out like any other time, except not looking around while being checked out. I know. I know. Kind of tough since I do look around.

Lo and behold, I noticed her glancing over in my area, but do not know if she was really looking since I did want her to know I knew she was who she was.

Writing this post – you may wonder why I did not say hi. I could have. But didn’t. I do not know. Again – nothing bad and nothing good. Though I did have a thing for her when I started working with her when I first saw her about 6, 7 years ago.

Anyway, thought to blog about this since it was nice to see her again from a distance. Her curly long red hair, nice profile (and body). I did not see her face, except in profile so I can not remember how she looked before I parted ways (as well as her accident)

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

Happy Birthday to Me

Greetings Readers

Alright - Happy Birthday to me.

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

Happy Birthday to my Mother

Greetings Readers

First thing First

Happy Birthday to Mom

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

The Toy Crane Game Machine

Greetings Readers

That toy crane game.

It is the devil.

I am strangely drawn to this coin operated game when I do come across this in my travels, mostly vacation travels. Though, not in my everyday travels since I could have a problem if I did have toy crane game to play everyday.

Then again, in the part of town that I live in near Denver, I can not even think of a coin operated toy Crane game being at. Definitely at no local supermarkets – and that includes any video games of any sorts.

Well Readers, it has come to a sort of tradition… fuck it… let me be honest. It is fucking tradition that I play a certain toy Crane game at the local supermarket chain store – Smith’s – in Rio Rancho, N.M. I have to admit that whoever does stock the prizes in the machine does a pretty good job of stocking items that someone would want. Yet, with the, in my ex-co-worker’s infamous line, “awesome” prizes – there are the fucked up prizes that are not even worth the 50 cents that cost to play the game.

The many years of playing those toy crane games I can tell which toy crane machines you may actually have a chance to pick up / win a prize. What I mean is that there are some toy crane machines that the “claws” are “loose” when picking up the prize. Also, I have come across a couple of machines that the “claws” are greased. That further pushes the odds against getting any prizes. Yes – Greased – You can see the gleam in the lights when looking at the “claws” from a certain angle catching the lights in the supermarket. Furthermore, I estimate that 25 percent of the machines that I do play and actually get the crane to get a prize when the crane does retract the “claws” the machine will jerk to a stop and when it does that jerk is enough to release the prize I did get from the “claws” and drop back into the machine’s pile of prizes.

Oh, how that fucking pisses me off. But, as Paulie Walnuts would say – “What are you going to do?”

Now, I am not going to drop more than two dollars in one meeting. After all, if I try and try and get close I usually know it ain’t going to happen.

And this depends on the prizes themselves. You Readers may think that the prizes are just there in the machine ready to be won. Oh no. About 90% of the time the good prizes are strategically placed in the machine so that you / someone will have to actually get the piece of shit prize before getting the, in the words of my ex-co-worker “awesome” prize. Meaning that if you see that one prize you want and even try the “claw” will get the prize and start to reel in. Yet, when the “claw” retracts the prize, the prize soon gets hung up and gets released from the “claw” Whoever stocked the toy crane machine has purposely placed the prizes in the machine so that you can not get the “good” prize without getting the piece of shit prizes surrounding the “good” prize since the bad prizes have been carefully wedge around the “good” prize.

So, even when I see a prize I desire, I must go for the piece of prize since I am there to play – period.

I know it is a waste of money, but I can not resist. To me it is like a gorgeous blonde I meet and I can not resist not saying hi.

I would say that the game is game of skill, but it is a game of skill and luck – but more of luck than skill depending on some the factors I did mention above. The skill is looking at the crane and the possible drop point and contact of said prize you want. Of course, if the “claws” rotate during the descent of the “claws” then skill goes out the door and luck comes into play. Although, with my background of toy crane playing I have taken in that factor so skill comes back into play since I have taken in the account that most likely the “claws” will rotate during descent.

Anyway, coming to this blog post and why I decided to write about this. This time around on vacation I was able to win two prizes at the same machine on two different occasions on my vacation. The first time I wanted the Simpson’s Bart/Krusty the clown prize, but fucking knew that prize was unobtainable without spending a lot of money to get. So, I opted for a prize I knew I could get and lo and behold – I did. Basically, A rabbit in a purple hat – a soft top pop toy. I wanted to play the machine and I wanted to win so I chose the only prize I knew I had a chance to win.

Then, on New Year’s Eve, after dropping my brother off at Albuquerque, me and my Dad stopped off at Smith’s and saw that someone won the prize I wanted before, but I saw another Simpson’s plush toy. Again, I saw that was not going to be possible to get without spending money. Then, I saw a prize that was not too bad and obviously a prize I could get. 50 cents later and first try – I got the prize – a walrus – his/her name on the tag is “Blithe”.

And that Readers is another part of my life. No addiction, but I can not resist playing when I see that there are prizes that I want.

What? The Holy Grail? Currently, I have seen a few machines with South park plush toys. And I so fucking want. You know me – I am a die-hard South park fan and I want any South park collectible. So far, I have not gotten any. I would say I have gotten close, but in reality no. What it has always comes down to is spending the money in order to get that South park toy.

I do not play every toy crane machine. Only the ones I see with prizes I would want to have. Otherwise, if no toys look desirable I am not going to play.

What made this obsession funny this vacation was that I pulled out a roll of quarters and told my Mom that I was going to play until I won something.

LOL – I said this, but did not mean it. Consciously, subconsciously, I wanted my Mom to middle name call me.

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

The Apology Letter (and last) to D

Greetings Readers

As I mentioned just recently in order to move forward you have to put the past behind you.

I have and thought to myself I might as well complete this statement by writing a blog post that will mean nothing to any of you faithful Readers, but only to that one person. I do not have a clue if she does read my blog, but there may be a chance that she does. Does that matter? I guess you faithful Readers may never know that answer to that question.

Hi D

This is not the first time that I was wrong and this will not be the last time that I will be wrong. I also do not like to give an apology for something that I did not do wrong initially.

I acted the way the way I did since the initial act was instigated by you. I felt that if you treated me the way that you did I could do almost the same thing, but in a different manner to you. It does take two to Tango and I know I have things I did to you that you could mention.

I gave you the silent treatment. Yes, silence is a powerful thing to do someone close. All I wanted was for you to ask me why I was giving you the silence treatment. I would have given you the reason why – no bullshit.

Like the reason I was mad at you for not keeping a couple of lunch meetings early in our friendship. Yes, something small and I understand that we all have emergencies and what not, but that was/is something I do not tolerate if the same thing happens over and over. Call it a pet peeve or not, but I do not like to be cancelled and cancelled upon over and over again.

I was mad for a time and then I came to you and explained why I was mad at you. If the other person was wrong I wait for them to come to me, but in the case with you I came to you and explained why I was the way I was. We mended the relationship, but with my character I can not forget that this event ever happened.

Well, this past year, you approached me in a manner that I was taken aback by surprise. I understand you got the degree and have that over me as education and status placement, but my placement in life is what I have chosen. Though, the one thing that I am not is an AA or an EA. I do not fetch coffee, I do not keep up calendars, and other things EA’s or AA’s are known to do for the person(s) they are hired to assist. You had a pissed off look and addressed me in a pissed off manner and I did not especially care for that.

Then, as the weeks past by and you noticed something different you used a mutual friend to try and talk to me through our mutual friend. That further drove the nail in the wrong direction. If there is an issue – talk to me directly, pull me aside, just do not involve any of our mutual friends into our differences. I am honest with you and can take most things that are said or thrown at me.

Sure, I would have apologized for my above actions in a heartbeat, but you never came to me at all. I could have went first to you, but after the first incident in our relationship I could not make the first move again. No matter what, in my opinion.

I enjoyed knowing you. As you know I made the effort to get to know you. And so as I learned of your martial status I did not let that deter me. And at that time I knew that I could not pursue you as a romantic interest – even though you are the woman I do desire – the hair color, the body, the voice and the demeanor.

I did flirt from time to time, but I hope never flirted any more than I should of. I never suggested let’s go for a drink, I did not inquire about your personal life. Though when I saw that one tattoo – it was an immediate turn on. But again, I kept the friend relationship to a minimum, even by not talking to you every day, which I could have done, but elected not to.

So, that is what caused my friendship with you to be cut off so suddenly. Now, I do and did apologize and I did call your phone number for the first and only time since you gave to me a couple of years ago and I left you a voicemail. I could have hung up, but I did not. I kind of remember leaving a voice message, but I do not actually remember what I said on the voicemail. Sorry. I was nervous, but my message was unrehearsed and my thinking on what to actually say was the tough part.

I could have said so much, but not knowing how you felt about me, what had happened and what you did not know – again I did not want to say something that could be perceived as something it should not. And I will admit that I may be thinking something else, but that is neither here or there. And as Prince sang “…it’s such a shame our friendship had to end…”

I do wish the best for you and I do hope that you give me a call, or send me an email to say something / anything from – a fuck you or you accepting my apology and tell me I am still an ass for acting the way I did to you. If not, I also understand your reasoning why not. I truly do.

What also bothered me, though not from you was that other people suggested that perhaps I was the one that made you question yourself. Or I was the cause for your troubles with giving you a bottle of wine. You giving me a couple / few rides home. I hope that was not the case. Again, I never asked about you and your hubby’s personal current relationship. I do not know if perhaps there is a therapist that you may be seeing for whatever reason(s). I do not know about your life except those moments you did share with me, which in my mind were not on a personal / taboo basis at all. Anyway, once those “seeds” were planted I could not help think I may have had something to do with your personal life. I hope not, but somehow I feel I did, but only by people even saying I may have a part. Consciously, I know I did not, but perhaps subconsciously I did do something that I am not aware of. If I did, I am very, very sorry. I am past that part of my life where I did have extra-martial affairs, but as we age so does comes wisdom and more thinking to the consequences of the act of an affair. Granted, I do have a lot of gorgeous married women friends and I do tend to flirt from time to time, but I think I know when I have / am crossed the line of going to far with a married woman. With your physical condition the last time I saw you – you were thinner than ever. I was worried, but also brought flashbacks to a woman I loved who is no longer in my life. Yet, that is another story, which I talked very little about, but affected and changed my life from that point on in my life.

You referred to yourself as a princess, I disagree. You are more than that – a desirable Queen. Though again that is something I never voiced to you - or could. And I could never call you a princess since I had a friend who referred to herself as a princess and she was that (but a whole more, but not princess like.) One princess in my life is plenty and I could not make two princesses in my life. If I were to be blunt you would be my “cougar.” Oh baby.

The only way to go any further is in my fantasies, but that is something that I will not share. We all have fantasies and I am not going to share about who I may be having fantasies about. (Not going to talk about that with you my faithful Readers… well you could buy me a couple of drinks and perhaps I might just slip about that subject.)

By the way, I know it has been two years, and like an elephant I really never forget things. Do you remember when I made Lasagna and I gave you a small Tupperware dish with a piece of Lasagna? I never asked for the dish back nor did I ask what you thought about my cooking. I am not worried about the Tupperware not being returned to me – at all. After all, my faithful Readers know how I personally feel about Tupperware.

If you need a reason, one reason, to contact me and are reading this blog, then that there is a reason (or additional reason) why you could contact me. Tell me how you liked/disliked my cooking. We may laugh. We may have uncomfortable conversation. Or we may say sorry to each other and see what happens. I do not know.

But again – As I was sitting with my family after Christmas in the living room – “in order to move forward mama always said you had to put the past behind you.”

I did see you walk out of my life before you were gone – walking to your vehicle. Corny as that statement reads but that is the last time I saw you. Sounds like a cowboy song. Or could just be life.

Take care and I hope the best for you in your life.

Yours Truly

Daryl

Readers, that is that. Readers, it took Forrest Gump to make me realize that I had to do the same thing. I have made my peace with myself and now look forward to a new year and a new age bracket to compete in. Hah hah. By the way, it does sound like I lost a love, but it is not. Just someone I cared about more than most of my friends - nothing wrong with that.

“and that is all that I have to say about that.”

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

A Summary perhaps?

Greetings Readers

The many things that I do not like coming back from the Ranch is that I have to check all of my Internet accounts as well as emails that I was unable to access. This is due to the location of where our Ranch is as well as the isolation from the world where our Ranch is.

I was able to log onto my Facebook account for a few minutes and check one of the email accounts I have and boy oh boy I do not want to go through that mess. Though with one of my email accounts - that is my junk email account so most of those emails can be deleted right off the top.

The facebook account is just an everyday account that I mainly use for gaming for the two games that I play regularly – Farmville and Mafia Wars. I saw over a 100+ friend requests, which I did not even bother to even get started on answering / replying. There were two messages, but the one that I was hoping for was not there.

I checked the blog account – not anything new really, but the traffic has picked up since I have started to blog once more again on a regular basis. I do like to see that since I like to think I am sort of interesting to follow / read.

What I have written is just my personal stuff. I have yet to check my work stuff. I almost got the hankering to check, but thought I am going to find out in another day so another day can wait.

I have no qualms about this. Since I do not have access to the Internet that means I will not be able to be on the Internet. Sure, I do not like being incommunicado for such a long time, but I have learned to deal with this. I know that I saw a TV commercial that advertised you could have Internet access via satellite, but for me that is so far not needed in my life. I can not even imagine the cost, but really thinking about it how much am I going to utilize satellite Internet? Only the times that I am visiting the Ranch is when I can use this service. The parents probably could use the service also, but first they will need a computer / laptop with wireless connection.

That is the tip of the iceberg, I have the mail and phone messages to check. As well as stock the fridge and do laundry. I also have to get caught up on current events that have happened in Colorado, as well as elsewhere. Though, I did listen to the local radio station KTNN and got the hourly CNN updates at the top of the hour.

Alright Readers, time for me to continue catching up with my everyday life and I will let you get back to yours.

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

First Post of 2011

Greetings Readers

In order to move forward you have to put the past behind you.

I know this, but this is sometimes very difficult for me to actually to do from time to time. Yet, if it is difficult for me why did Forrest Gump never give it a second thought about putting the past behind him?

I just do not know.

Anyway Readers, I have taken some time off from work and my regular life for about 2 weeks. I said, or say, I think I needed it, but to be honest with myself I really did need the time away from my everyday life. With that said I headed off to the Ranch and sent some time with the family.

Very enjoyable and it took a few days get out of my everyday routine. Granted, I was sleeping on a mattress, in the farthest room from the pellet stove, but I was okay with that. I did bring my laptop and new portable dvd player so I had something to keep me busy/entertained.

With all that said I was able not to think about the things that have happened to me in the past month and started to question myself. And question others. Not second guess myself or others, but to think too much about something that should not be thought about that much in the first place.

I slept, cooked, worked a bit here and there, chopped ice for the animals, rode the four wheeler to name a few things that I did on my vacation. I also watched / listened to a few movies as well as played some Diablo II on my laptop. I realize that is an old computer game, but I was looking for some game that I wanted to load that was not too heavy on the RAM or the hard drive space on the laptop. Also, I borrowed a sub woofer from my brother so I wanted to hear a game an all new way. And let me tell you Readers there is a big fucking difference in the sound. Wow.

See. I was able to put the past behind me once more, but there are just a couple things that I will remember though, but know that I am able not to think about day after day, week after week.

In the next couple of weeks I will perhaps touch on some of the things that I did on my vacation. Like I swear that I saw the splitting image of Uncle Junior at Furr’s Buffet in Albuquerque, NM.!The icy cold weather that kept us in for a few days since it was too too cold to work outside on the Ranch. The three dogs that were shot since they went onto our Ranch property and killed one of Ranch Animals, my “Christmas Present”, my winnings at the toy crane game at the local supermarket – Smith’s, another award (as well as thank you letters) from the 4-H club to my parents for their yearly contribution, the blind calf’s progress, and how I spent my New Year’s Eve (not exciting though).

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

Christmas Day

Greetings Readers

Hope your day is what you wanted it be

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

Just a Seasonal Message, last for the year

Greetings Readers

I am not going to say anything really, except

May your holiday be what you want it to be.

Note: D.P. - hope your Hubby had nice birthday and H got/done something nice for him.

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

Gentleman Jack

Greetings Readers

In all of my years as being a Jack Daniels drinker, well let me be honest, a connoisseur, of Jack Daniels I never had a drink of Gentleman Jack.

I never gave it a second thought.

What it comes down to is and I am being general about this there are basically 3 different grades of Jack Daniels. Kind of like Gasoline. Usually, there are three different grades.

Anyway, I figure there is really no middle grade. I mean that you either get the cheap grade or you get the high grade. Who really settles for mid-grade? My camero knows the difference between the cheap grade gasoline and the high end (octane) gasoline. She will either purr like a woman or sputter like an old woman.

With that thinking I have applied that exact mentality to Jack Daniels. I have tasted the basic grade and then I have indulged in the expensive grade. I never even thought about buying the mid-grade Jack Daniels.

Until this month and year. I saw that the local liquor store knocked off about $ 7.00 dollars on the Gentleman Jack Daniels and with a bit of coaxing from my friend I decided to buy my first Gentleman Jack Daniels.

If you are a Jack Daniels Drinker then you may know the difference. If you are serious Jack Daniels Drinker then you will know that the Gentleman Jack is much better than the general Jack Daniel’s. Though even if you think you are a serious Jack Daniels Drinker, but not as serious as you think you are you could mistaken the Gentleman Jack for Single Barrel Jack Daniels. No, not even close to taste, but I could see the above average Jack Daniels drinker may make mistake Gentleman Jack for Single Barrel Jack in its first drink.


It is not bad, but just okay for the price that I got it at.

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

Shortest Day of the Year - Winter Equinox 2010

Greetings Readers

I have to say that I actually look forward to this day. After all, I do mark this day on my calendars.

I despise the time from the time change (fall back) to today (well even further) since I am riding in the dark in the morning and the evening. My days are night riding until weekend when, or if, I do get to ride out in the day light.

Perhaps just another day to anyone else, but to me it is the shortest day of the year. And from this day out the days get longer and longer and the nights get shorter and shorter until June

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

Back to Blogging (again)

Greetings Readers

I never did officially announced that I was back to blogging (once more again for the upmteenth time.) I do not know if I am. I am not thinking about what or why, but I think the reason is that I do have stuff to talk about - whether or not you are interested or want to know - I feel that I need to write it out.

More often that not I really do express feelings better when blogging than talking about it. As the saying goes this time of the year we are busy this time of the year. Whether it relates to your life, your job, or Christmas - we are on the move thi part of the year.

And taking the time out of your day to talk to someone for a bit may not be the best time to converse.

I do feel better than I did a week ago. With the help a few friends to comment and make me laugh I think I going to make it past this little rough spot in the road of my life.

I still waiting for a phone call, wanting to know. But at least now I am not thinking about getting one all day. Or if did I miss the phone call. She probably has a lot going on and to hear from me out of nowhere may not be the one voice she needed to hear at this time. I do not know. And No Readers, I am not going to call again, unless I make the phone call after a night of drinking - hah hah. You never know Readers.

Anyway, writing helps me to express my feelings one day to the Internet world. Therapeutic? I do not know, but I do feel it helps me.

Oh, this blog site appears to be running normal again. They have been update the blog of the day as well as the helpful notes now and then. I do see other bloggers still blogging away. With that said I think the time to continue blogging more steadily may come to pass.

until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

Shaking Scared, my dear Readers

Greetings Readers

The Present - I personally do not believe in the bucket list.

Flashback - 39 hours ago - I had to leave work early, well technically on time, since my contacts came in and I needed to pick them up.

I left work about 4:30 PM and then I was the leaving the eye doctor about 5:00 PM or so. I was in familiar territory that I bike regularly in, but since the season is now Winter and the night is fully here I have to be more alert when biking at this hour. Especially so, with the 5:00 o'clock after work rush hour, December, and people trying to get home.

I was unsure which way to get home - take one of the main thoroughfares? Take the residential streets home? Take the round about way home, which means zigging and zagging home, but the safest way home.

Oh yes, I had the reflective yellow and white vest, My front bike light, my back red bike that someone said if someone lived on the moon that they would be able to see my bike back light flashing from Colorado. LOL. I also had my green flashing light, which is attached to my backpack. That light was acquired the day before the 24 Hours of Boulder and I have to admit I do like the light. So much so, that I am actually using everyday. The only thing that is missing is my bike helmet. Nothing more, or less, that I can say about that.

I do admit that I did not cross at an intersection. So, I am to blame for what almost came to be.

There is a Tokyo Joe's in this little strip mall and thought to myself - maybe.

Full dark was here traffic was stacked going South on Yosemite. Going North, there was no traffic. Instead of heading to the next light I decided to cut through the vehicles that were stopped since the red light was on.

Readers, you know the roads. Usually there are two lanes. The on the right side of the road there is not a lane, per se, but a turning lane. Usually there is a sign indicating right lane must turn right. You just can not use that lane to keep going straight. Albeit, whether it be street sign or the white markings on the road indicated with a white turning arrow or the white line indicating that you must turn right. Buses except, of course.

That was where I decided that I was going to cut across. Traffic was stopped in both lanes going South and I knew that cars are to turn right - suppose to anyway.

Side note - "I have the right" - You know Readers that is one thing I can not say in this situation. First of all, I should not be cutting across vehicles waiting at a stop light. After all - it is fact that is where bikers have a greater chance of getting hit. Whether it be cutting or weaving in and out through stalled traffic may be ok to you. It is not. And yes, I know this.

Well, I looked at the stop light - still red and I could still see the green light on the cross traffic. Traffic is at a standstill on where I want to cross. Looking good and safe. I casually road in and through the first lane nearest the lane going in the opposite direction. I did not make any eye contact with any drivers since I was looking at traffic around my area. I get to the second lane and cross in front of a SUV type of vehicle. I could not actually see over or around the vehicle, yet I kept the same speed I was biking at. Not normal biking but probably faster than I should be going while cutting across through two lanes of stopped traffic.

I reached the final lane, which is a turning lane only. I saw a pair of headlights coming down the turning lane. I kept going. In a second. Yes Readers, in that one second I noticed that one car was not going to turn right.

I acted on instinct. Again, being aware of my surroundings is something I do and I would have to say that was the only thing that kept me from being a statistic. I managed to stop, turn my front wheel to the left, put my left foot down. I said, I was two inches from being hit, but I think it was an inch.

I stopped so fast, but again Readers, as I wrote I was biking faster than I probably should have been. My back end of the bike came off the ground and was threatening to flip me off. The bike swung to the left and was going to swing into the car and taking me with it.

Another second later the car was already at the stop light turning west. She was gone. Yes she. I saw her scared face barely, and I did not even have time to cuss or anything else.

Wow.

Another second later I get my foot on the bike pedal and try to pedal to the side walk, but I could not get on the bike pedals. I was shaking pretty badly.

Readers, I really scared myself on what just happened. And what might have been. And I do not get shaking scared at all. That I can remember.

I tried to get pedalling knowing the light is going to turn green. I could not do it. Still straddling the bike I walk the bike to the entrance of the strip mall and then take a few breaths.

I did not look around. I was concerned for myself. I could fucking care less what people just almost witnessed or what not.

In this strip mall there is a liquor store - Fuck Tokyo Joe's. I needed a drink. Something to calm me down. I grabbed a 6 pack of 2 Below and carefully biked home on the sidewalks and residential back streets to get home from perhaps getting hit again.

I was still shaking slightly when I arrived home about two miles later.

Getting back to the first sentence of this post - I am not going to create / do a bucket list - due to this very close incident. Fucking close Readers. Hmmm... let me talk about a bucket list on a future post though.

Yet, I did think about the last words I said to some people in my life. Most good, a few bad and well... last words, in a sense.

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

A Close one last night!

Greetings Readers

Wow, this entry may have not been made due to my cracker-jack timing last night!

I will write more later, but I almost became a statistic of bicycle / vehicle accidents last night. I usually do not get shaking up after hits / close hits, but last night was one of those rare moments.

until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete... who lives another day

The Ignorant Senor(ita) - Update 12/2010

Greetings Readers

The Ignorant Senor(ita)

Well, I happened to go to this blog the other day (that I use to follow off and on) and I see that he/she is almost in the same boat I am. Though a bit different. Blogging off and on, but he/she has some issues about coming out from his/her anonymity, maybe, again.

Fuck me Readers - That recent blog post on why, how come and what would - was like the terms and conditions on the back of the credit card statement! And talk about beating a dead horse - over and over! I get it. Your Readers get it. You obviously have issues about yourself and can not see them.

As Nike indicates - Just do it! Or shut the fuck up and move on.

Although, I do keep my friend's names classified. Those names are just as confidential as the nuclear missile arming codes. Although, I think I have posted a couple of pictures of my friends.

Anyway, he/she wrote a fucking epic post on why he/she keeps everything "secret" Believe me, I can understand and relate. But, then he/she wrote another epic post on what if he/she came out.

Though what I have read is no different from any other person's life and relationships. Your stories and relationships are not unique. But of course, other people's stories, lives, events are kind of interesting to read if you are looking for other things to learn, know, explore or just follow. Your friends are no different than my friends. I have friends that do not get along with certain other of my friends for what ever reason. I too have some cheap skate friends that do not tip 15%. I have friends that I desire. I have thought dirty thoughts about a couple of friends I have - come on who hasn't. I have friends who mean the world to me, but I never told them that.

I can write, spell, use big words, but I do not do that all the time. I mess up my sentence structures from time to time. I use the word their, when I should have used there. I try to type correctly and most of the time I will proof read my blog posts for grammatical errors. And I try to write more than a few sentences when posting. Though, I am not going to write a 3,000 word essay on every blog I post.

I do not think I have blogged about specifics of my sex life. I know I mentioned a couple of intimate desires, thoughts and things, but nothing about a specific sexual encounter I have had. I will admit that there is a desire to write about a sexual encounter I have had. Yet, that is personal. Excuse me Readers, I am smiling as I am typing this since I know that most likely will - I have planted (blogged) that thought and now that will probably bounce around until I do. And should I - I will tell you Readers - The aroma of her fragrance, the clothes she wore, what she was not wearing, her body, the way she looked, her lips... Whoa. I better stop.

I understand the Ignorant Senor(ita) being in their twenties, thinking they are more mature than they are. I will not argue. Matter of fact, I thought that way when I was in my twenties. I lived the life of a twenty something. I did all that. and more, I bet.

I also tell you Readers that I am flawed. I am an asshole. I am rude. I am pissed off. I was wrong. What he/she has not told his/her loyal Readers that he/she is none of that. He/She does not not say that.

I have told you Readers alot of myself, which if I knew you in person I would never tell you all of this. And if you know me and did Google me to find out what/who is Mr. Charley, I could care less. I know what I post is out there for everyone to see. You Readers have seen my nipple(s), probably seen a few butt cheeks, the type and color of some of the underwear I have. I am not embarrassed or ashamed. I blog like how I feel / act. My friends know that I blog and I have provided a few of them the link. I have told you Readers what turns me on about a woman and what not.

Again, the only thing I do keep secret is my events/interaction with certain friends. And yes Readers, the friends that I do write about on certain situations, I often give them their "codename" on my blog. They laugh and ask how did that name come up, but I really do not know. Bobbie Rae is Bobbie Rae, I actually believe if she was not who she is today - she would be a Bobbie Rae from the South. LaMont was used because of Sanford & Son - which me and friend just smile and laugh about since he is so not Lamont. hah hah. Pssst - yes Readers - he is so a Lamont.

What I do not do on this blog is gossip or talk shit about on my friends. It would be easy, I bet. But this blog is, and never, will be about that. I do gossip in my real life, yes I admit that, and do talk shit. We all "hate" or "dislike" someone else for whatever reason and I could blog about those people, but I feel that is wrong. But I do blog about the people I "hate" who ask me "what time is it" while waiting for the bus, while I have my earphones in, which he/she can clearly see.

Readers, I think this blog post is getting too long now. Anyway, I am not making a point, but this recent blog from the Ignorant Senor(ita) was about his/her secret identity, relationships and life. Again. Oh yes, again and again. In the beginning of his/her first blog was the reason why for the blog. Then, throughout he/she still has to bring up a few reasons why he/she can not divulge his/her identity and his/her friends. Matter of fact, his/her friend's names are not even fake names. An Example would be like, "The fuck up," "The Coffee Drinker" "The Canon Powershot picture taker" "The 5th time unemployed friend" etc. You get the idea Readers.

In closing, I could not read every word of his/her recent last post. It was the same story again. And the same analytical breakdown on why he/she can not come out from his/her secret blog. And once again too fucking long to read and think this is interesting (for the umpteenth time)

He/she has not blogged about about committing a crime. Well, he/she did blog about getting so drunk and passing out on a front lawn - so that would be the crime of public disorderly. He/she has not blogged about sleeping with a CEO/President that would / could create a scandal. I think he/she is worried about what his/her friends would truly think of him/her if his/her friends, that he/she does calls friends, could put a real person with the Ignorant Senor(ita) blog. Or he / she is really worried about all the things he/she said about her friends on the internet. Not down and out bad, but carefully written that he/she is better than everyone else in a nice condensing manner.

Sorry Readers, I can not stop typing - Again, that Tipping and the Ignorant Senor(ita) had with a couple of years ago. He/she has some serious issues about tipping. I do myself, but would not blatantly point that out who specifically did not tip 15 % on my blog with my friends. If he/she is worried about not meeting the 15% unwritten rule to tip (though not unwritten at some restaurants these days) after a friend's get together meal then leave extra. Yes, you should not have to, but shit happens. Some people do, some people don't - who are you to say that is wrong. And to make sure that you never have to leave extra tip do not go out with them again for a meal, except fast food (where we as a society do not generally tip fast food employees)

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

The Lonely Lit Up Santa Claus

Greetings Readers

Any other time I would not give a shit.

Yet, with the things that are happening around me in my life currently I feel sad for this one 6 Foot Light Up Santa that I have been seeing on my bike route home after work for the past week.

I take this bike trail part of the ways home and it is pitch dark in most places.

Anyway, tonight I see the light up Santa facing the bike trail, the trees, the creek - and there he is. Lit up and his right arm in the waving hi position. Basically, waving to me as I bike on by each night. Just me, him lit up and the one little sidewalk path lamp with a small string of Christmas lights (I estimate about 50 light bulbs on the string) lighting up this darken part of the suburbs.

No one is going to see this Santa Claus driving by. No one will see this Santa Claus walking by at night due to the lack of light. I think, the only time that this Santa will be seen is by the likes of me biking home. Though there could be the occasional dog walker, there could be the runner running at night on the bike path. Other than that - that Santa will not be able to wave to the world with his lit up smile.

Yet, from a certain point of view one could say that this Santa is lucky to be displayed, at all. And I do not disagree.

I do not care for Christmas, but I do hope that any person who comes by the Santa will give him a glance. That's all that Santa needs. A glance. A second. or more.

This Santa - to me - will be remembered as the Lonely Lit Up Santa Claus of 2010.

Update - 12/14/10 - Sorry Readers - this is the best picture I can do without the flash and darkness. And his left hand waving - not his right.

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

The Amazing Race - update 2010

Greetings Readers

I am not sorry about not talking about the Amazing Race.

In the past two years - the Amazing Race has gotten "dull."

What I mean is that I do not want to fucking see a flaming Gay / Lesbian couple. I know flaming couples. And I do not want to see that on the Amazing Race. The Amazing Race is about racing. Not about the fucking lives of gay / lesbian couples on the race. Those gay / lesbian couples that are featured are over the top. Too fucking over the top for me.

The Amazing Race is about racing. Not about gay / lesbian couples showing disgust about "poop" coming out from an animal. That is something an animal can not control. Get over it.

Anyway, I hope the future Amazing Races focuses on the race - and not the gay / lesbian teams. I like the teams. I like the competetion, but I hate the showing of the gays / lesbians having trouble. Or the bull dike or fem acting gay to a point of hurting to watch the show.

By the way Readers, my close friend had their cousin participate in the Amazing Race recently.

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

"Come Back..."

Greetings Readers

Am I going to follow a path down to depression with the certain events that have happened in the past month? Depression is too strong of a word to use, perhaps a sadness I have not felt in years.

I hope not. I do hope not.

I was watching the movie Inception again and I think everything in my life just bombarded me and then the scene at the end of the movie when Cobb goes looking for Saito was playing at that moment.

He is eating a bowl of food, remembering, looking, helping and old looking Saito to remember.

The music sets the tone of the scene.

"Come back..."

Then, the scene switches to the 747 first class cabin. Cobb blinks and looks up and around. Then, camera view pans from left to right starting with Arthur. The music is low and so melodic and fitting after what has happened to that point in the movie. Arthur looks at Cobb, looks down, then looks up at Cobb with a smile. The smile says it all - we did it Cobb. You came back, my friend. The camera continues to pan right and then we see Ariadne slumped low in her first class cabin sleep and looking at Cobb directly. The look of confidence.

Lastly, Cobb's view continues to pan right and stops on Saito. Saito is also slumped in his first class cabin seat. He looks at Cobb, seeing him again but not as an old man, but young again. He then reaches for the phone and makes the call.

The scene is nothing to write about, except for me, perhaps. The scene showing the happiness and all of them making it back from the dream levels, as well as Limbo.

I think it is safe to say if you have not seen a friend in a while you can not help not to smile, acknowledge them and just know you have their friendship.

Cobb walking in the airport terminal seeing his team that went down into Inception with him. It was a glance a times when he saw his one of his team members, but then there was the quick glimpse for a second for other team members before walking on.

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete

The Phone Call and eventual voicemail message

Greetings Readers

I made one of the toughest things that I have not done in a long time.

I called a friend (well, Readers that may not be entirely true since I was not friend material for most of the year) yesterday after finding out she was terminated.

She gave me her phone number about a year or two years ago and I have never called her since that time.

With me just finding out what happen, my current status with me as not being a friend and something else - I had to call.

Though before making that call it was actually making the call. It was like calling a woman for the first time to go out on a date. Was the phone number still good? Was she going to answer? What am I going to say? Does she even want to hear from me? What would she say to me?

When was a good time to call? Do I call from home? From work? Perhaps I should have a drink before calling after I get home. Should I call after 5 PM? And so goes the questions

Needless to say, I picked up the phone and started dialing a few times all day then stopped. Eventually, it was time to man up and get it over. Boy, I was nervous and was sweating under my armpits. Oh yes, that's how nervous I was.

I dialed and soon heard the automated voice indicating please hold while that party is located.

That was the longest 15 seconds, I think, that I waited.

It was even longer wait than my mom's voice last week saying "That another Charley died." I was so nervous after hearing that - fearing the worst.

Anyway, soon I hear her voicemail message and was kind of relieved that I got her voicemail. Though, the thought of what would be appropriate/right to leave was next. I did think for a microsecond of hanging up, but x'ed that thought.

Readers, I did not want to ramble with my voicemail message, but I think I did. I did say I was sorry, I also said I would be probably the last person who thought she would hear from. And a couple of others things. I said bye and that was that.

I was relieved after the phone call, but was shaking a bit. Did I do the right thing?

I know Readers I am being vague and not telling you what happened for me to be the way to her this year. If you faithful Readers know me then you know I do not like being treated a certain way. It happened with me from her and I did not like that. And Readers I could not not pretend that it did not ever happen. I was looking for a sorry or something, but that did not happen. Eventually, I gave her the silent treatment.

Yet, finding out I put all that aside and made the call. Perhaps she may call me back. Perhaps she will talk to me again. Perhaps she will tell me - Fuck you. Perhaps. If not, I do not blame her and I will understand.

I am sorry for the way I left her the last time she ever saw/talked to me.

And Readers this is another reason to add to why I do not care for the Holidays this time of the year.

Note to Nick - I guess your statement long ago to me - that I am the rudest person ever - is correct. She would agree with you.

Until the next time

Daryl Charley
The Fallen Athlete